Ashes White (xBunnyWolf) Offline

33 In a relationship Female from Creston       1033
         

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Raevyn - 08/18/2016

Thirteen years seems like an incredibly long amount of time. So many things in a life changes, grows, and settles into place. However, losing a member of your family after only thirteen years puts into perspective just how quickly that time flies. How quickly things can disappear entirely.

My baby Raevyn had to be put down today. I spent a good portion of my night on my living room floor, petting her while she lied there with her head propped up on my leg, telling me with her eyes something I hadn't wanted to accept. She was ready to leave, and she needed me to be ready to let her go.

About a year ago, Raevyn was diagnosed with Cushings disease. And she's gradually been getting worse despite the number of medications the vet and I tried using on her to ease the suffering it caused. It wasn't bad at first but it's been a long downhill battle with an inevitable ending. Just so happens that today was that day.

We went to the vet, and after the examination, she told me she would give her until the end of the weekend, and that was if I was lucky. That the pain was getting worse, she could barely walk, and getting up and down hurt too much without assistance. She told me I could take her home, make her comfortable, and let her pass, and I was tempted to take the chance to spend a bit more time with her. But looking at her face, I knew I couldn't do that to her.

She knew and accepted what was going on; had made her peace with it. Rather than keeping her drugged and lying in pain unable to walk properly, I made my decision.

The same vet she'd gone to for her thirteen years of life cried as I did when she administered the sedative that would make her sleepy and calm, then the IV that finally let her rest. When I first took her, her eyes held pain but there was no fear, only acceptance. And when she passed, there was only peace.

I couldn't have hoped for a more peaceful way of her passing. She was calm, and with people who loved her. And she'll definitely live on through those people. In the end, I think that's all anyone can hope for.

Zodiac signs go to a Haunted House

Zodiac Sign Goes to a Haunted House
Only people who know zodiacs can understand this joke:
All the signs are happily eating dinner when the lights go off…

Cancer: “HOLY SH*T, OH MY GOD!!! IS EVERYONE, OKAY!?”
Sagittarius: “F*CK!!! SOMETHING STABBED MEE!!! AAARGH!!! AAAAAAAARGH!!!! AAAAAARGH!!”
(all signs start screaming and freaking out)

Sagittarius: “AAAARGH!!! AAAAAARG— Just kidding you guys. …”
(Taurus slaps Sagittarius)

Taurus: JERK! DON’T JOKE ABOUT THAT!

Libra: “Everybody, calm down, there’s no need to freak out.”

Aquarius: “I think Libra is right…”

Cancer: “Yeah, it’s just the light out…”

Libra: “Now, we just need to wait for the lights to—–”
*creeek*

Libra: (cries) “OH F*CK! WE’RE ALL GONNA DIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!”

Cancer starts crying, Sagittarius Laughs, The other signs start to freak out

Virgo: “Okay, okay, everyone, calm down, for real…”

Capricorn: “I have a plan, let’s all walk slowly and quietly.”
(All signs agree, and they walk quietly and slowly… except for Aries.)

Aries: “UHM…. BORING!!!” *stomps around*
Other signs: SHHH!!!

Aries: “That’s IT! I’m leading the pack!”

Capricorn: “(rolls eyes) Fine then, lead the pack.”
(As Aries walks in front of the group, there is an odd and disgusting smell…)

Virgo: Gross… Somebody forgot to clean the house…
(The signs walk together some more, and they find where the smell comes from… A dead body.)

Pisces: “AAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!”

Sagittarius: “Whooaaaaaa!!!”

Leo: “AAAAAAAAAAAHH!!!”

Aries: “AAAAAAAAAAAH!!!”

Cancer: *faints*

Scorpio: *Looks at the body interestingly…* “Cool…”

Capricorn: “AAAAAH!!”

Taurus: *stares at the body wide eyed.*

Aquarius: *has no reaction.*

Libra: “AAAAAAAH!!!”

Gemini: “WHAT THE HELL, OH MY GOD, A DEAD BODY, GOD, OH MY GOD, SH*T….!!!”

Virgo: “Ew… Gross…”
…. Pause…..

Pisces: “Is he… Dead?”

Capricorn: (Sarcastically) “No, he’s sleeping…”

Libra: “No man, I think he’s dead…”

Capricorn: “….”

Scorpio: “Let’s poke it!”

Leo: “Hey guys! I found a stick!”

Scorpio: “Poke it’s eye with the stick!!!”

Leo: “Okay!”

Taurus: “NO! WAIT! What if something happens?”

Capricorn: “Nothing will happen, he’s dead.”

Pisces: “Wasn’t he sleeping…?”

Capricorn: “…..”

Virgo *tries not to laugh*
(Leo grabs the stick, and pokes the body’s eye.. The body suddenly wakes up, and scares the sh*t out of everyone… All the zodiacs faint… Except for Aquarius. Who has no reaction whatsoever, and Gemini for no apparent reason)

Monster: ….. Rawr?
Gemini: Hi! My name is Gemini! Do you like talking?
Monster: RAWWWRRR!!!

Gemini: I like talking! Do you like talking? My friends talk! Talking is fun! talk, talk, talk!

Monster: …..
The End..

- See more at: http://wtfzodiacsigns.com/post/123904592307/zodiac-sign-goes-to-a-haunted-house#sthash.1KXsDkUB.dpuf

When to run from a D/s situation (for subs)

When newbie subs, with asinine “Doms,” need to run away.

-If a “Dom” wants to be YOUR dominant and refuses to give you his real name, phone number (cell, home and work), home address, AND MARITAL STATUS, run away.
-If you are sick and your “Dom” won’t let you recuperate in your bed, run away.
-If you are with a “Dom that trains” and he tells you he prefers a girl without hard limits because “they are a sign of weakness,” run away.
-If a “Dom” violates your safe word, run away.
-If a “Dom ” accepts your submission on the first date, run away.
-If a “Dom” punishes you for being depressed or having some other mental illness, run away.
-If you catch your “Dom” lying or cheating on you, run away.
-If your “Dom” refuses to speak with you or isolates you as a punishment method, run away.
-If a “Dom” refuses to participate in aftercare when needed, run away.
If you would not trust your “Dom” with your life without ANY reservations, run away.
-If your “ Dom” uses a hard limit as punishment, run away.
-If your “Dom” wants you to be used by countless others against your will, run away.
-If your “Dom” doesn’t let you contact your friends or family, run away.
-If your “Dom” doesn’t want to be seen in public with you, run away.
-If you must call your “Dom” Master/daddy on the first date or meeting, run away.
-If your “Dom” refuses you a safe call and wants your meeting to be kept a secret, run away.
-If your “Dom” doesn’t ask you what your limits are, both soft and hard, run away.
-If your “Dom” punishes you for using your safe word, run away.



Signs of a fake ‘Dominant’

-Controlling behavior due to fear of losing their partner.
-Explosive temper
-Behaves like a spoiled child when not getting his/her way
-Abuses drugs/alcohol
-Does not take responsibility for mistakes
-Uses unhealthy behavior to gain control over the submissive
-Isolating the submissive from family and friends
-Discouraging self sufficient behavior
-Not allowing any social interaction which does not include the dominant
-Out of control jealousy
-Emotional blackmail. Example: Keeping the submissive in a constant state of fear that the relationship will end if they don’t get their way.
-Emotional Withdrawal. Example: Using the “silent treatment” or physically withdrawing and cutting off all contact rather than communicating and taking responsibility for the situation.
-Withdrawal of affection.

So.... This happened

I've had a few people on here who message me ask me why I NEVER give out my personal info like my last name, actual state, city, etc. This is why. AND this is why I think any person who posts their actual information is f*cking stupid.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[10:34:03 AM] Sam: i guess you speak to many folk online
[10:34:16 AM] Sam: i dont and im clingy so i always have high hopes that never amount to anything

[10:34:17 AM] MidNyte Bunny-Wolf: I do, sometimes yeah. Most of my friends are online, so I spend a fair amount of time talking to them on here

[10:34:23 AM] Sam: fine
[10:34:44 AM] Sam: and you are here a lot but never come to say hi, but wait till i say hi. typical girl

[10:34:54 AM] MidNyte Bunny-Wolf: I literally just got out of bed
[10:34:57 AM] MidNyte Bunny-Wolf: Not 5 minutes ago
[10:35:06 AM] MidNyte Bunny-Wolf: And have to go to work soon. Exactly when did you want me to be messaging? While I was sleeping?

[10:36:00 AM] Sam: ok Ashlee

[10:37:31 AM] MidNyte Bunny-Wolf: I'm sorry if I've given false hope for something here in some way. But I'm not itnerested in making this more than friendship. And I did tell you that from the start of being friends with you

[10:39:02 AM] Sam: it dont matter. i dont do long distance realtionships any road. relationships need to be close.
[10:39:51 AM] Sam: youre pretty and fun and i want you
[10:39:57 AM] Sam: and it angers me you dont want me

[10:41:24 AM] MidNyte Bunny-Wolf: I can't help that. I told you upfront that I wasn't looking for more than friendship

[10:42:53 AM] Sam: aye well you act as if you need one but then say no..
[10:42:55 AM] Sam: makes no sense
[10:43:04 AM] Sam: guess you rather be a slag
[10:44:05 AM] Sam: i dont think ive ever met a girl that doesnt say the same stuff you said...which is 50+ in my life.
[10:44:19 AM] Sam: modern day world, full of unfaithful, adulterer scum
[10:44:36 AM] Sam: that should be sentenced to death
[10:48:32 AM] Sam: i know you made it clear. but i bet you go from bloke to bloke online everyday with your flirtacious, promiscuous flaunting. its immoral
[10:48:46 AM] Sam: and only folk interested in that are sexual predators
[10:49:25 AM] Sam: whores and pervs should be killed. tell you this modern day lefty socialist state we live in wont get away with making children wh*res or promoting them that acting like one is right
[10:49:36 AM] Sam: left wing politics = pro rape
[10:50:09 AM] Sam: strange that the women are the ones truly supporting and acting this way to scumbags. men are men and you women can just say no....
[10:50:29 AM] Sam: but women are sickos by flirting online. im decent and moral and no online tart
[10:51:16 AM] Sam: to come for cheap thrills. but nowadays traditionalism is sh*t on while progressive whoreish behavior is promoted and if you’re not a wh*re youre looked at weird
[10:51:25 AM] Sam: by society brainwashing
[10:51:37 AM] Sam: you as an american know that to be true
[10:52:04 AM] Sam: liberal support abortion = killing of babies just like a pedophile serial killer but they deny death penalty for rapists in jail

[10:58:42 AM] MidNyte Bunny-Wolf: You know what? If I wanted to wake up and be verbally harassed in the morning, I'd still be with my ex. And my being single and flirting online doesn't make me a slag you f*cking a**.

[10:59:06 AM] Sam: it makes you a slag coz thats what slags do. theres no difference
[10:59:12 AM] Sam: you flirt with strangers who are most probably sickos
[10:59:25 AM] Sam: so makes you just as bad

[10:59:30 AM] MidNyte Bunny-Wolf: How the h*ll do you come to that conclusion?

[10:59:30 AM] Sam: and im not verbally abusing

[10:59:34 AM] MidNyte Bunny-Wolf: The f*ck you're not

[10:59:46 AM] Sam: im being blunt and direct instead of topping it with sugar

[11:00:27 AM] MidNyte Bunny-Wolf: No you're being a d*ck
[11:00:33 AM] MidNyte Bunny-Wolf: Because I don't want you and you want me
[11:00:38 AM] MidNyte Bunny-Wolf: And that's not my fault

[11:00:45 AM] Sam: men online, 95% are pervs and id say 70% are predators or and have been known for sexual crimes against kids or women and you know that they are pervs it is logic that men online are

[11:00:47 AM] MidNyte Bunny-Wolf: So you can take that and shove it up your a**

[11:00:49 AM] Sam: you do want me

[11:00:53 AM] MidNyte Bunny-Wolf: No I don't

[11:00:58 AM] Sam: im just not in US
[11:01:00 AM] Sam: you do

[11:01:13 AM] MidNyte Bunny-Wolf: ... I'm so glad men can read minds and know just what a woman wants
[11:01:21 AM] MidNyte Bunny-Wolf: Cause every woman loves to be called a wh*re for flirting. Meanwhile I never even flirted with you, which is why you're pissed off and throwing a tantrum

[11:01:52 AM] Sam: thats what they are when you flirt with strangers....youre flirting online with PEDOS.
[11:02:05 AM] Sam: most are sickos and say sick shit. trust me i know the messages you get from pervs
[11:02:22 AM] Sam: i know what men say. i do know how my gender thinks more than you do even though you get the messages ok
[11:03:14 AM] Sam: so i know that nearly all men online are rapists, , child molesters, pedophiles therefore you must have flirted with at least one of them...and since it is logic that men online are pervs then you would know this also
[11:03:20 AM] Sam: which makes you a party to child rape
[11:03:25 AM] Sam: and therefore a whore
[11:03:31 AM] Sam: its fact
[11:05:02 AM] Sam: a decent woman with dignity and self respect would never flirt with anyone. only the person they are with
[11:09:27 AM] Sam: go on keep chatting up your child molester scumbags...im sure youll keep telling yourself that you aren’t a pedo enabler or slag no matter what you do or say to them....proper unfaithful girl you’d be. And dont compare me to your bf..he gave you verbal rubbish everyday? ok. well what would you say to your daughter whos acting liek a slut online?

[11:09:52 AM] MidNyte Bunny-Wolf: You’re not my father! You half brained twit.

[11:09:54 AM] Sam: its more of a reality check for you than harassment

[11:10:04 AM] MidNyte Bunny-Wolf: I don't need you to give me a reality check. You sound psychotic.
[11:10:08 AM] MidNyte Bunny-Wolf: Are you aware of this?

[11:10:42 AM] Sam: im just too blunt for you to deal with facts so all you can say is im psychotic
[11:10:43 AM] Sam: but yes
[11:10:54 AM] Sam: ppl who hate pedos and rapists nowadays are viewed as psychotic
[11:11:11 AM] Sam: coz lefty democrat scum like to make the pedophile the victim
[11:11:13 AM] Sam: i get it
[11:13:53 AM] Sam: if i cannot have you i may as well say what i think. im sure youll block me like the cowards always do
[11:14:12 AM] Sam: typical cowards running from facts and home truths
[11:17:35 AM] Sam: and you do or you would want me in time if we knew each other coz id not treat you liek a toy liek all men treat women. im loyal as they come..unlike most. thats one thing i can be sure on...but you keep shacking up with folk who actually see you are shit and vermin...
[11:17:40 AM] Sam: thats what these pervy men see you as
[11:17:55 AM] Sam: while they are chatting and flirting to you theyll be chatitng up little girls
[11:17:59 AM] Sam: they are sick c*nts
[11:18:05 AM] Sam: and i am the psychotic?

[11:18:28 AM] MidNyte Bunny-Wolf: Oh. Yeah. You're loyal alright. You sort of remind me of the stalkers I see in movies who tell the woman they love them, completely convinced they’re their girlfriend or wife while they keep them locked in the basement. And yeah you are. The shit you're spouting makes you sound f*cking nuts
[11:18:39 AM] MidNyte Bunny-Wolf: You say you're clingy
[11:18:44 AM] MidNyte Bunny-Wolf: I say you're f*cking stalker material

[11:19:00 AM] Sam: stalker? if i stalked you id be taking to you 24/7
[11:19:09 AM] Sam: stop making sh*t up and applying it to me
[11:19:13 AM] Sam: also i dont have a wife or gf

[11:19:21 AM] MidNyte Bunny-Wolf: I said stalker material, you dumb a**. Not my stalker

[11:19:24 AM] Sam: so again stop comparing me to husbands that have wives and say they are loyal
[11:19:45 AM] Sam: well if you can name the girl im stalking go right ahead
[11:19:53 AM] Sam: if you cannot then. pfft again we are making shit up
[11:20:24 AM] Sam: seems to be your most defining asset. lying based on the husbands you flirt with who have wives who say they are loyal
[11:21:52 AM] Sam: then somehow making up a wife i have.
[11:26:14 AM] Sam: well im going. i wont be surprised if you delete me. i do liek you. im just always angry. take care see you if i do again. hope work goes well.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

So basically, my flirting with anyone online is me enabling child molestation. All men online are perverts and sickos and are all married, so I'm committing adultery as well. And while men are all perverts that's okay because they're just being men, and I should be a woman with better morals and only flirt with him because he likes me. Screw what I want.

Oh and... even though I'm enabling child porn, committing adultery, and am a wh*re... he hopes to talk to me later. WHAT?!?!?!?!

I love waking up to crazy.

Dom for sub

So I went into a BDSM room yesterday and had the audacity to question why someone felt the need to put their title of what they supposedly are in their name. Apparently this resulted in said "dom" getting his panties in a bunch because I huwt his wittle feewings, and blocking me from said room.

So... rant started.

Anyone who feels the need to have Master/Sir/Dom/Lord/etc in their name, is not a Dom. Not in any way shape or form should these people own ANYONE. These people are kinksters playing at being dominant and that's fine. But don't claim to be something you're not.

I don't care if they claim to have submissives offline or if they have 50 on here, they're fake. And anyone who wants to argue this point, can feel free to message me and we'll discuss the merits of anyone who feels they deserve to be addressed by a title before they actually own the person they're wanting said title from. Please. I'm begging you. Message me about it.

And the people on here that I know that feed into this bullshit are just as bad.

"Oh he has Master/Sir/ blah blah in his name, he MUST be legit" or "He capitalizes it when he refers to himself like 'Me/My/etc' because he's so dreamy and deserving and..."

Excuse me, I had to go gag.

This is what I picture going on in these so called Doms brains.

"Someone wants to have a varying opinion than me? Wants to question my motives? Oh, better block them because having an actual discussion with someone lower than me on the totem pole is like actual work. And, well, everyone knows that BDSM is all about 'My' pleasure, not work. I mean, seriously, who has time for that shit? Now, drop down, crawl over here, and lick my digital shoe, slave!"

This is essentially what happens, because God forbid people actually think for themselves.

And what kills me, is when I go on these rants, like yesterday ten people will message me in private and be like "Oh I agree with you completely." But not a single one of you will voice it in the room because you're fucking weak. Weakness breeds weakness and that's exactly the type of shit that allows these pricks to continue doing this. It's what allowed them to start it in the first place.

So do me a favor, grow a fucking backbone and rather than following someone else's bandwagon. Stand up for yourself and what you believe in IN FRONT OF THE PEOPLE OPPOSING IT.

You want to be a submissive? And I mean a legit submissive, not the shit I see on here - stand up for yourself. Make the Dom/me work their ass off to be deserving of your submission. Because anyone who knows fuck all about BDSM in its true form knows the submissive holds the cards. You call the shots. And for fucks sake, make them prove that they are worth you, because - and I can't stress this enough - YOU ARE WORTH IT.

You want to be a Dom/me? And I mean a legit Dom/me not like the ones I see on here - Encourage the submissives on here to stand up for themselves. Be a person worth their submission, not some douche in a room that can bark orders. Anyone can do that. Be honest, tell yourself you want to see people in healthy relationships and provide that when the time comes. Don't sit back on the sidelines to avoid confrontation because you're too much of a pussy to stand up for what's right.

The thing is, and I don't say this lightly, I'm about two steps from deleting this account entirely. The only thing that's keeping me here is that I can't contact some of you in any other way. Rich

Genius in the Crowd

The Genius Of The Crowd - Charles Bukowski


there is enough treachery, hatred violence absurdity in the average
human being to supply any given army on any given day

and the best at murder are those who preach against it
and the best at hate are those who preach love
and the best at war finally are those who preach peace

those who preach god, need god
those who preach peace do not have peace
those who preach peace do not have love

beware the preachers
beware the knowers
beware those who are always reading books
beware those who either detest poverty
or are proud of it
beware those quick to praise
for they need praise in return
beware those who are quick to censor
they are afraid of what they do not know
beware those who seek constant crowds for
they are nothing alone
beware the average man the average woman
beware their love, their love is average
seeks average

but there is genius in their hatred
there is enough genius in their hatred to kill you
to kill anybody
not wanting solitude
not understanding solitude
they will attempt to destroy anything
that differs from their own
not being able to create art
they will not understand art
they will consider their failure as creators
only as a failure of the world
not being able to love fully
they will believe your love incomplete
and then they will hate you
and their hatred will be perfect

like a shining diamond
like a knife
like a mountain
like a tiger
like hemlock

their finest art

Period Warrior

Completely took this offline... but it's just so freaking true I had to post it



Period Warrior - by justpixi
Men always tell me they'd love to know what women are thinking. Well, I'd like to walk you through a morning in the life of a woman with aunt flo visiting. And before you cringe, grow the fuck up - and respect the fact that if you put your dick in it, you can learn a little about the blood that flows from it.

Ready? Ready.

4:30a You are awakened by a strange pain in your abdomen area. Food poisoning? Better go to the bathroom just in case.
4:32a F*ck YOU period!!! Why are you 3 days early? OF COURSE, now I'll have you for the date with the guy from fet.
4:37a Back to sleep. Pissed off. With little elves stabbing your stomach and twisting the knife.
7:39a Wake up. Bathroom time again. You grab your back, thinking you threw it out. Convinced you slipped a disk and will soon need an ambulance.
Nope, just period ache.
7:41a GODDDDAMMMMMITTTTT. You apologize, "I'm so sorry, favorite pastel underwear. I thought a light tampon would do it while sleeping. I was wrong. Leaking like a faucet."
7:43a Spend 10 minutes trying to decide whether or not to wash out panties and try to save them, or to say "f*ck it' and donate them to the trash.
7:53a Did you just spend 10 minutes debating with yourself? Huh.
7:55a You don't have time for this shit. (throws them away)
8:00a Showers. Oh, great...your shower puff is f*cking white. Looks like you murdered someone. Amazing.
8:15a Throws shower puff in the garbage on top of massacred panties. Your wastebasket already looks like Gettysburg and it's only day one. Onward!
8:20a Tries on outfit. It's too tight in the tummy. At least you know you're not pregnant. Still positive here.
8:22a Next outfit. Too tight in the ass. Examines closely in the mirror. Is that a tampon string through your pants? F*ck you, wardrobe.
8:24a Outfit 3. Is white. Way too optimistic. Throws it on floor. Give it the finger. Throws self on bed in a dramatic fashion and begins to cry for no reason.
8:27a Outfit 4. Long tunic, leggings. Perfect. Spandex is needed.
8:29a Applies makeup. Skin is as oily as f*ck, and a zit is forming. Of course. 34 years old and still at the mercy of my monthly cycle.
8:30a Applies 2 coats of concealer and one coat of foundation to aunt flo zit. Is it more noticeable now? Contemplates the fact that it looks like one of the faces from Mt. Rushmore is etched into the side of the foundation.
8:40a Blow dry hair. Suddenly, feeling very hot. So hot. Melting hot. Body is on fire.
8:45a Scream at hair because of course it hates you today. The world hates you. You're bleeding like a stuck pig with zits, and have tiny elf babies stabbing your stomach. You look at yourself in the mirror and mumble, "Don't f*ck with me today."
9:00a Off to work. You are late. Your boss will be pissed. Asshole. You contemplate telling him you woke up in a pool of blood this morning, smiling like the joker as you dodge in and out of traffic, flipping people the bird liberally.
9:21a You walk in just in time for the 9:30a meeting. And realize, it's time to change your tampon. And, you wore a tunic, and pants without pockets.
F*CK.
9:22a Bend over your desk to try to shove tampon into your waistband.
"Hi, you going to the meeting? I thought you could sit by me, and help me with that project we were assigned to?"
You pause. Of course, it's the hot new single guy.

F*ck.

Life.

Right.

Now.

9:24a You realize you're still staring at him. Nodding. He's talking about his weekend. You have no idea what he's saying, but don't want to allow his gorgeous mouth to pause.
9:26a SHIT!!! Forgot to go to the bathroom for tampon changing of the guard.
9:27a Rush to morning meeting, living on the edge...will you make it the entire half hour without leaving evidence on the conference room chairs? Only time will tell.
9:31a-10:02a You sit uncomfortably, nervous you will wreck the furniture. And suddenly, you feel it.
Wetness.
Nooooooooo.
You squeeze your thighs together and shift.
Then say to yourself, "It's just sweat. Swamp ass. It's hot in here, and you wore a f*cking tunic in the summer, genius."
Relaxing, you smile at hot office guy, zit on your face starting directly at him, and hands over your bloated lap in attempts to cover the mini period baby belly that has formed.
10:00a Why isn't this meeting over? It's 10-oh-f*cking-a CLOCK, assholes!!!
10:02a And, we're done. Finally. You stand up quickly, too quickly. Forgetting about the tampon concealed in the waistband of your leggings, it slips into your pants. Great, now hot guy will see your newly created "mini dick."
10:03a You carry your notebook in front of your crotch awkwardly, feeling extremely exposed as you turn your ass to the rest of the people still in the meeting. You say a little prayer to baby Jesus that you're red free, and swiftly walk to the bathroom.
Congratulations, period warrior.
You made it to midday.
The BEST news? Staff training all afternoon.
F*ckers.

Question to Miss USA contestants

Should Math be taught in schools?

Miss Alabama - I do not believe in Math. And don't think we should encourage it. Math is a theory, and not what the bible tells us

Miss Arizona - This is a hard one... there are two sides to this... On one hand you have math. on the other you have... it's like... non-math. Children have the right to learn anything they want to learn. Alchemy, scientology, gymnastics! Aliens... uh, you know how to make basic mixed drinks. Whatever those Heavens gate people believe....

Miss Idaho - All 7 year olds should have the right to decide if math is scientific fact. We live in America... not Russia. You really don't know what the square root of 16 is. No one does.

Miss Delaware - Just a little bit. This isn't the times. There are numbers everywhere. On phones, on houses, on.... microwaves. And not to women.

Miss Arkansas - I think that people should be as knowledged as they can. I think they should get learned so that you know, they can make a choice about all the world things.

Miss Vermont - Yes... It's math! I'm sorry, is this a joke?

Miss Montana - Numbers are great. But they should also learn colors, smells, vibrations.

Miss Indiana - Math should be left out of the equation. Not the equation like in a math sentence. Like an E-QUA-TION. Right? So... Cause I don't like.... believe in Math.

Miss Hawaii - I guess if other people want to learn math, they should be able to... but then they'll be the type of people who know math...

Brat Packs.... LOL

I totally stole this but... I'm sharing it anyway


Beware the Brat Pack

Brats are like bunnies. When you are dealing with just one, they're all soft and fluffy. With pretty, wrinkly noses. And a cute tail. But, if you aren't paying close attention to the situation, that one bunny can turn into a gang of rabbits. Once you get surrounded, then you've lost control. There will be blanket forts, ice cream and trouble.

So, as soon as you realize that you are being surrounded by a Brat Pack in full brat mode, here's what you need to do:

Back slowly away (fast movement excites them)
Avoid any eye contact ('Dom eyes' just make them hungry)
All the while, maintain that frozen, monkey-fear smile (lest they think anything is amiss)
Once you've reached the minimum safe distance, turn and run. They're fast, but you've got a head start.

And you only need to outrun one other Dom.

Hilarity

Funny things I find and want to post

I'm going to buy myself a label-maker. Then I can be whatever I want.

Always love a woman for her personality... they have like 10, so you can choose freely.
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