Wednesday came out last Wednesday on netflix. and it was.. a nice try?
OK.. so.. They made the Addams hispanic. which wasnt the bad part. I made my jokes saying "Mexican Wednesday before Black Friday" and Wednesday was like "You mus be strong pugslito" Its called humor.. if you can find humor in that.. its your problem.
Anyway.
So Wednesday had a weird start. Pugsley was being bullied in high school.. which prompts Wednesday to put Pirhanas in the school swimming pool because Pugsleys bullies were on the swim team. If it were me... I woulda started snapping pix and laughing about tiny weenie speedos and mermen. but thats me.. I hurt others psychologically. lol She is constantly reminding people she is dark and moody and should be alone. "Im so quirky.. just know.. I am quirky"
However.. this forces Morticia and Gomez to send Wednesday to a Hogwarts type school called "Nevermore academy" it had all the edgar allen poe tropes that supposedly made it goth. Like saying Wednesday was a Raven.. at Nevermore.. they even had a Poe Statue. blah.
Anyway so it goes back to Harry Potteresque antics.. Like having a sporting event to win a house cup amongst its monster high teens. Lycans, Sirens and Gorgons.. oh my. Wednesday helps her dorm boating team "the catwomen" win the house cup. then.. they have the triwizard ball.. called the Rave N dance. In which she does a weird dance that makes a boy jealous.
In the background is a murder mystery.. A creature with huge eyes is attacking people before Wednesday even gets to nevermore. but upon her attending, it attacks come forward even more. Wednesday gets attacked by a telekinetic nerd who says she is the chosen one to destroy the school and shows her a ripped page from an old painting of a girl with piggy tails and a black peter pan dress.. And yes that's the style of dress she wears.
Ok so Im gonna shorten this up.. Her room mate is a werewolf that hasnt wolfed out yet. she has 1 tall skinny dweeb who is supposedly the hot guy in a love hate relationship. A townie coffee barista vying for her affection. A jealous Siren.. trying to compete for creepiest girl.
Like the first few episodes were kind of slow and stupid but it changes with episode 4.. of the dance. Its after this Gomez and Morticia show up for parents weekend.
Its revealed Gomez was a murder suspect for a rich townie who was obsessed with Morticia... morticia reveals it was her who stabbed the guy and Gomez took the blame. But then.. science prevails when Wednesday and Morticia discover the guy died from Nightshade poisoning. negating the fact morticia stabbed him and he fell off a building. I didnt write this tripe lol.
However... with all murder/mystery/supernatural tropes. Wednesday blames the wrong person for being the creature when it was in fact.. the weirdo barista guy. its always the barista guy.. always and the true villain was.. bom bom ba bom.. Christina Ricci. Because llike other reboots.. the original shows up to pass the torch. its a trope of reboots. For instance the latest Scream movie.. the killer was after billy loomises cheat baby. passing the torch from billy loomis to that guy and his asian co-hort Mai Ling.. or whatever.
Or Jay and Silent bob passing the torch to Jayleen and Silent Takito. or whatever.
Ricci Passed the torch to Ortega. thats season 1's meaning.
Ok so points Id like to make. Wednesday is meant to attract teens to young adults. Its why they made Gomez less creepy and flamboyant. Why Morticia isnt making deadpan goth puns. They are meant to be dull. I miss Raul Juilia's Gomez.. so dramatic.. so weird. Guzman plays him sort of dopey and gloomy..
Dont get me wrong Katherine Zeta Jones has been one of the most beautiful women in hollywood. but.. seeing her as Morticia was weird. the dress looked like it was made for someone with kim kardashians measurements.. the boobs looked padded. its like.. why a fishtail skirt? it was better draped or pencil draped.. fish tailed was like a bad Diana Ross dress.
Its definately for teens or young women. it had all the things they like. cute boys.. fashion... zoomer lingo.
otherwise its gonna seem stupid. especially when you have to be reminded that Wednesday is not like the other girls.. by her reminding you literally "Im not like other girls" Me So Quirky"
LoL issue an article and found a reason to blog. It's about another type of stupidity. The over privileged pregnant dumbass.
Fetal Alcohol Syndrome has been a known disease for decades. It stunts growth and keads to developmental disorders. For decades people have said, don't drink or smoke while pregnant.
So this article I read was from an Australian dummy who drank while pregnant. With her first kid she had a glass of champagne. She assumed it had zero effect. So with her 2nd she had some wine on different occasions.
Her second child has developmental disorders. She was like "wine is alcohol? Alcohol doesn't disinfect and make clean babies? Alcohol can damage a child?" The assortment of stupidity afforded to white chicks I guess.
What does she do? She starts a podcast about mocktails. How to make alcohol free champagne and other stupid things.
Then she's like "we won't know if the booze damaged my baby. But we know for sure it hasn't not hurt the baby"
Im like gee.. What a stupid thing to say.
Then again you have to remember... Aussies and kiwi descend from rapists and murderers and syphilis infected tools. It's why they were sent away from England. Australia and New Zealand were meant to be prison islands.
Every time you look at a Hemsworth you should realize a generation or three ago, Angus Hemsworth raped his neighbors goat and stabbed a fat kid and stole his meat pie. They put him on a boat to Australia to die. That's right. Grandpappy Hemsworth was garbage folk.
If you are pregnant and are stupid enough to drink. Good luck.
The shame you'll feel.. Should last as long as your warped child exists. Happy Thanksgiving.
With chaos becoming a daily occurance, it's kind of easy to lose hope. We got our unending Covid battle, no leadership during mid term elections. Rampage gunmen and Twitter going amok. It's kind of hard to see a silver lining Dave would sell at goodwill.
Fear not. It's the holidays. That slow buffer between chaos and restart. A time we can stuff our faces and stockings.. Both Christmas and silk lingerie.
I don't know why people waste time crying about politics when you choose the wrong side. So you nitpick until you feel you have a string enough point to argue. Plz stop. STFU. It's the holidays.
It's gonna be a sad one for me. Why?
In 8 days my game shuts down forever. Bless Unleashed is shutting down its servers. There is no offline mode. It's gone forever. The same fate awaits online/steam.
It's Goodbye to my spunky level 45 ultra OP mage., War. Max lion blessing. Max Lily anthes blessing. Max paetion blessing. Hero of Lumios. Defender of the ancient lineage. Leader of the guild WarAngels. Bambi chaser. Blessed by fire. What the community referred to as "A Fkn Beast" tank.
I've chosen the cradle of flame as my last look at the world spot. Surrounded by hellbulls and imps. On the throne that sits bare.
I also take with me, the title "Master Chef." Since I won the last crafting event. I made 1 of every meal and potion and panchea. I'm lucky to have master leveled cooking a year ago.
War., daughter of Lumios. Survivor of the Telos Massacre. Tatiana Sroza's favorite assassin. And makes great Apple pies. It was a good life. *plays taps*
I think I won't make It to the 30th. Because the servers go down at 10 am Cali time and I'll be at work.
Anyway enjoy your Thanksgiving. In case I don't blog by then.
It began with a massacre. Covered up by a lie. Since then, Sgt Eli Whipp, a Native American army soldier has been looking to redeem himself.
The story was told, as a British woman in the old west was on the search for her son's killer. Thats all you read on Wikipedia, but it was so much more.
Eli's journey leads him to Cornelia Locke, a woman in search of the man who killed her son.well actually. Her Journey led to Eli. She finds Eli hanging in front,of a trade post and pays for his freedom. At the cost of ending up prisoner to a D-bag intent on defiling her. Just as she is about to get assaulted. Eli shows up and kills her captor and they escape.
They soon form a bond looking for the same guy. A journey that leads them to bushwackers. They find an attacked wagon with a dying pregnant woman. Eli cuts the baby out and they find a child hidden in the wagon.
They end up at a ranch owned by a native couple. Eli trades Labor for a compass so Cornelia can take the children to find their community. It's while separated they discover the truth behind the ranch.
The couple capture Eli and turn him over to Kills on Water. He is questioned about what he had seen at the massacre at the beginning. He tells a tale, meanwhile Cornelia goes back to the ranch and confronts the couple with violence.
She find that Eli is being sent to murder a lady bushwackers and her sons. Instead, Cornelia kills her and rejoins Eli in his adventure.
So while this is happening. Thomas Trafford is a British homesteader who starts a community which sees growth with other white homesteaders staking land claims. He gets angry that his cattle has been taking hits. Getting fetuses cut out if expecting mother does.
Suddenly there's a serial killer. Branding folks with "BM" everyone suspects Billy Meyers, til he turns up dead. Leaving behind a wife and child. Well teen.
It's at the 4th episode the "past events" episode that reveals more of the story.
Cornelia was aristocratic, living in England when the man she was sorta engaged to,us revealed as Thomas Trafford.
A man named David Melmont shows up and tells Cornelia, Thomas was captured by the law for murder and consorting with prostitutes and he was put in a well for eventual death unless they paid his fine for £2000. Which She pays.
Melmont shows up,sometime later to take her over the,coals when she confronts him with a letter from Thomas. She reveals Thomas told her he would not teturn to England as he put his money in the homestead and pride won't let him see it fail.
It's then she is assaulted by Melmont.
It comes back to the present tense where Cornelia and Eli come across another homestead community led by Major Mackay. Mackay claims he is doimg good for the natives by taking them in and turning them into servants. It's then Eli recognizes a servant as "Touching Ground" wife of Running Hawk. He hand gestures to her and she runs off and sets her son free. Eli and Cornelia take the boy but are soon attacjed by Mackey who,is a sharpshooter.
Mackey shoots "white Moon's" horse, crushing his leg. While they are pinned down, Touching Ground kills Mackey and Eli,and Cornelia leave with him.
They find A travelling doctor. Its here that everything is revealed.
Cornelia explains her son dies of Syphilis. A disease that is also killing her. During Her assault by Melmont, she gives her syphilis. She in turn had a baby born with it and lived til he was 14.
After he died, she lost purpose and soon revenge became her purpose. She travelled half the world away to,find Melmont.
It's also revealed Eli is also hunting down Melmonts men, the ones responsible for a massacre of native people.
Upon reaching their destination. They find Melmnot and Trafford left to Canada. Oh by the way. The local sheriff discovered the BM brand in the murder victims were the TT brand from Thomas Traffords homestead. He also up in talking to Trafford discovers Thomas has the same brand in him. Reveals the true dipshit us Melmont.
Eli, Cornelia and the sheriff go to see Billy Meyers wife. She reveals she is not Billy's wife. So much as she was Melmonts rape victim and her son is Melmonts son. But that Meyers was instructed to be her proxy husband. And that Meyers never touched her.
Cornelia tells Martha that she and her son might have Syphilis. But there's a small chance they might not. But if they are there is a period of latency.
They are attacked by one of Melmonts henchmen, who is in his final stage of syphilis. Looking monstrous.
They finally reach Melmont who is holding his own son hostage. They reveal Trafford died, seemingly going mad during a thunderstorm and drowning in a flash flood.
Cornelia confronts Melmont and reveals they had a child who died. And Her sole purpose was to kill him. Except she freezes. It was Martha who shoots Melmont. Eli finishes him off and takes some responsibility so Martha cant be executed for murder.
The sheriff arrests Eli. But in a turn of events. Frees Eli, pins the murder on another dead man. Eli and Cornelia part ways after an emotional good bye.
Cornelia returns to England.
15 years pass and the Syphilis reaches end stage. Her face and body deteriorated from the disease. Its then she seeks out White Moon who is with a travelling wild western show and is in England,
He tells her he plays Eli Whipp in the show. She gives to him the eagle whistle Whipp gave her. He thanks her with a kiss on her hideous lips.
The music was pretty good. Featured "into dust" by Mazzy Star.
The part they play "long time traveller" by the wailing Jenny's was pretty good. It's when Cornelia tries to tell Eli,she is dying of syphilis and it's why she didn't kiss him. And he says "I already know. It doesnt need to be said" and she turns to him and says "oh Eli" and ruins their photo.
At first I hated their depiction of natives but the opinion shifts.
The last episode is so good.
I probably ruined it with spoilers but I left out some stuff. So you'll have to watch for the full story.
Lindsay stars as "Sierra Belmont" and I will refer to her as Sierra... ok?
So Sierra is a hotel heiress. Snotty.. rude. But claiming to want more than her rich girl life has to offer. She is in a relationship with a Social Media Influencer named Tad. Anyway so they are in her Dad's hotel and she is just.. like so blase about her life as an heiress with no skills.
Her father creates a job position for her so she can sorta have a job.
the funny thing is.. Lindsay is like too old for this role. I can see it played by someone in their 20s. Not someone transitioning into their 40s. She often holds her head weird as to not have turkey neck.
Oh and she sings "Jingle Bell rock" sorta.
Sierra is out with Tad.. for whats supposed to be a photoshoot for their influencer brand.. when he pops the question and slips a ring on her finger.. At this very instance Jake Russell.. a local owner of a BnB finds her after she rams her big head into a tree.. almost sonny bono-ing herself.
Oh Jake by the way.. is a single father living with his daughter Ava and his dead wife's mom Alejandra. Ava makes a wish and A weird background Santa winks and causes a gust of wind to knock Sierra off the mountain top and smack her head giving her amnesia.
She's still a bitch.. still rude as hell.. but she just cant remember her name.. "Does your hotel have room service? I am.... um.. uh... Hi"
Anyway.. he teaches her how to be a maid.. and falls in love with her.. awww.. and like in overboard.. they plan an event together. Unlike Overboard, they didnt bang.. just as they were about to Kiss.. Tad shows up and shes like.. I am Sierra.. instead of being ungrateful, she thanks him for taking care of her.. cuz hs didnt take advantage of a memory loss victim.
Its during the announcement of her engagement to Tad.. she realizes.. she has a skill now. making the bed.. cleaning.. JOB SKILLS!
She thanks her Dad for everything and raising her in her 30s.. and she breaks up with Tad..
She reunites with Jake and his kid and is like.. Home has always been where christmas was... in my the courtyard of my daddy's hotel.
Then Santa Winks.. and its the end.
So... She is a snotty lady.. bonks her head.. gets put to work as a maid.. falls in love with a creepy single dad and his family. Im surprised the hispanic grandma wasnt all "I cut you beesh" but its whatever.. they had a happy ending.. and all she had to do was fall down a mountain for christmas.
Also the mountain top green screen scene was dope. it was sharknado quality.
In 2008... the world was introduced to "Otis" a 2008 movie about a lonely pizza delivery guy. Over weight... socially inept.. a dreamer if you will.
All he wanted was the perfect prom night.
Otis has been kidnapping teenage girls.. and doing a serious role-play about his high school senior year.. where he is the captain of the football team and his girlfriend is head cheerleader.. and he finally loses his virginity at the prom. but it never turns out that way.
So we were graced with the weird al biopic in the tune of fictional comedy. It was cheesy, it was predictable.. It was weird. It was Al.
It takes place in an alternate universe where the accordion is the tool of the devil... And polka was the Satanist dance. It takes us to the fictional albeit beginnings of Al Yankovics beginnings.
Raised in a home where writing words to already known songs was off limits. Surely a world where the likes of Ava Max and Olivia Rodrigo would be deemed evil. We find a young Al struggling to find himself.
As a teen he sneaks off to a teenage polka party where the teens were addicted to that Minnesota sound. This is where he displays his love of polka after promising his mother he would suppress his need to play polka music. The hay boy joke was cute.
Eventually leaves to the big city where he finds his parody voice. While making sandwiches for his roommates to the tune of My Sharon's. My bolog-na is born.
I thought it was funny how they changed history. Making Madonna his love interest. How "Bad" by Michael Jackson was the parody.
Madonna gets captured by Pablo Escobar because he loves Al and is using Madonna as bait to get Al. Al ends up killing Escobar and his men. Madonna suggests they take over the cartel and Al dumps her. She gets furious. Al returns home
He discovers his dad was Amish and while on rumspringa, finds an accordion and realizes his love for polka music. And in his own way we sparing Al the heartbreak of a failed polka dream.
Then Al writes Amish Paradise.
Al is then assassinated while accepting an award.
After some historical photos forest gump style. We reach the "Carrie" ending. As Madonna kneels at his grave with flowers, Al's hand rises from the grave and grabs her arm.
I liked the ending. I don't recall if they used it in the Carrie remake.
Anyway it's not a good movie or a bad movie. It's like a satire of a satire of biopics. Its weird and it's probably gonna win many Razzies. Pitting the razzle dazzle back in Razzies.
People are leaving in droves after Elon Musk demanded $20 for a certified check mark a month for the check mark.
The real question is.. now that he's $30 billion broker.. how long til Twitter completely drains him?
As I said before.. Elon Musk is only smart enough to get people to pay for online money by being the middle man between you.. the bank.. and porn sites ending up on your bank statement. Since he cant repeat that.. he's begging for $20 for a check mark.
What does this mean? It means anyone can get a check mark and claim they are a celebrity or popular person... and pay $20 and people will think.. Oh this is the real Betty White. Even though she died a year ago..
Some celebrities wrote their "Fuck Elon Musk" posts and either stopped using or de-activated their accounts. Especially since his "Free speech" bullshit opened the doors for racism and other terrible propaganda.
For instance.. Sunday.. he retweeted a post about Paul Pelosi's attack being homo-sexually motivated. of course he deleted it.. because he's a moron and he still has to pander to the masses.
He went from being a public figure to public transit. You can take a dump on him.. if he wants your business, he's gonna have to fold. Especially since we live in a post safe-space. I think first its gonna be the moms who get angry.. then the republicans... it will turn political for sure. Then he will fold faster than a house of cards.
Because he is stupid. He said a few months ago "I fear the economy is going down the toilets" then he fired people from his telsa plants. the economy held.. so ofcourse buying twitter and firing 75% of the staff would be the obvious move to make his "Prediction" come true. but its not like twitter employs 100000 people.
It wont dent the economy.
He's a moron who is less rich and about to be made bitch %1.
I didnt write this tripe lol.