I can spot a scamming spammer from three leagues hence, and I will report your arse. So don't even bother.
Geoff: While the longest government shutdown in U.S. history continues, President Trump's approval rating is down, and there are cracks showing with his base.
A new NPR/PBS NewsHour/Marist poll finds Trump's approval rating down and his disapproval rating up from a month ago. He currently stands at 39 percent approve, 53 percent disapprove — a 7-point net change from December when his rating was 42 percent approve, 49 percent disapprove.
Geoff: Well, the meeting I was entirely underwhelmed for next month (because it was going to be in Milton Keynes) has been moved to the company's head office. In Covent Garden.
A much nicer place to visit.
So, after the meeting, I might mosey over to Parliament and give the anti-Brexit protesters there a hug (and some doughnuts).
And I might scout around the tea shops and other dens of iniquity to see if I can spot hatstand.
Geoff: A mother who turned to IVF after years of trying in vain for a baby said she was shocked to find out she was expecting triplets - two of whom had been conceived naturally.
Betty Bienias and her husband Pawel, from Corsham, had been trying to have children for seven years.
When the couple eventually turned to IVF, they ended up conceiving one child through the NHS treatment - and two more naturally as part of the same pregnancy.
Mrs Bienias, admitted that she and her husband "didn't listen" to advice to remain celibate during the egg collection.
They do look absolutely stoked about this. Good on them.
Geoff: So Trump stops Pelosi from flying to Brussels and Afghanistan on a government plane on government business because of the government shutdown.
But Melania can fly down to Mar A Lago on a government plane.
Senior members of the British civil service have advised their staff to prepare for a snap general election.
That's not what this country needs.
Geoff: Even if Brexit is cancelled, the damage already done to the UK, in terms of internal division, economic harm, and the trashing of our international reputation will take years, if not decades to repair.
Geoff: The WHO (the World Health Organisation) have classed anti-vaxxers as one of the top ten threats to world health.
Geoff: The UK government has put all reserve forces in the army on standby alert from 10th of next month for a year, in the event of a no deal Brexit.
I don't recall the last time a voluntary government policy was so dire that army reserves had to be put on alert just in case.
Geoff: Awww, Count Dankula (the foul cock who posted a video of him teaching his gf's pug to perform a nazi salute when he said, "Gas the Jews" and got nicked for hate speech) has been demonetised by YouTube. And his boss at UKIP, ol' Lego Hair himself, Gerard Batten has complained about it on twitter.
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