I'm a happy weird girl... musical theatre nerd... In love with a Russian boy named Kirill... (relax... he's been in New Zealand since 1996 lol)
Obsessed with True crime, British comedy and RuPaul's Drag Race
All about the fur baby life... have had cats in the past... looking to get one again when Kirill and I move in together, and possibly some little baby ratties and hopefully if the budget allows a wee doggo...
2 part time jobs that can get a bit nutso (boy do I need a holiday...)
I'm fat and I love cheese... I think those are all the important details... if you need to know anything else ask away! (Except if you're gonna be rude and gross lols)
Songbird_nz: I am covered in mucus... excess flakey skin (thank you eczema flare up) and chicken soup!!
The year that gave me whiplash! Not gonna lie, this year has probably been one of the most traumatic years for me.
People I thought I loved and trusted, placed blame on me incorrectly and chucked me out of my flat out of nowhere. Oh well, I got a great new little flat and it made me get rid of some toxic humans in my life.
I had a seizure out of absolute nowhere, ended up in hospital ran MANY tests which all came back negative was really confusing and terrifying. Just glad that it hasn’t happened again!
The way my Step Mother has talked to me over many years and never facing any repercussions for her toxic behaviour led me to have a severe falling out with my Dad. If anything, this means that my night terrors are now down to an absolute minimum.
However, the highs have been incredibly high this year too. I not only met but I fell in love with the absolute love of my life. We fall in love more and more every single day and grow stronger and happier every time we see each other. Yup, this is gonna be the forever thing.
Choir has been INCREDIBLE this year, it scared me last year but it really taught me to take over my anxieties. Definitely my favourite project I’ve taken on.
I got the amazing opportunity to visit Melbourne for the firs time this year and have catch ups with my little sister. It was an amazing trip and I will treasure these memories always, so grateful.
Oh, and the weird and dramatic weight loss which is not only baffling but something I’m incredibly proud of! Haven’t been this thin since I was 19!
So here’s to 2020 and the new decade! I hope it’s a good one for all of you!
Songbird_nz: I think it’s time for a life update...
So... due to some pretty solid reasons for doing so, we have kicked out my flatmate Natasha for being lazy, disgusting (NEVER did her dishes) having her boyfriend round constantly (like... he was basically living here... we often questioned if he had his own place...) without contributing in any way. Also, the fact that she was nearly 3 months behind on rent was getting out of control.
Her reaction to this was actually rather aggressive, but luckily no threats were made (well... nothing we need to worry about anyway...) we did have to trespass her boyfriend from our property tho, so the rules are if we see him on our property, call the cops!
But now the room is empty... and now the rest of us are liable to cover the rent missing from her (oh yea, she refused to pay rent over the last week) so now we each have to cover an extra $70 a week until the room is full again. I’m so broke I’m asking for all the extra shifts that I can, just to help cover that.
Also, a week after Kirill (my boyfriend in case you forgot 😝😝 yes! Oh my god we’re STILL together) moved into his new flat he gets told by the owner that they are selling and they want the house empty by the 31st of January. So he gets less than two months in his new place.
A silver lining in this situation is that Kirill is making inquiries about our empty room, soooo if that becomes a thing we could be pretty much living together! He says he can’t really imagine better, although we won’t be sharing a room he’d still be happy knowing that he’ll be living next to me.
However, all this stress has really taken its toll on my body and now I’m stuck at home in bed with a stomach bug! 😢
Songbird_nz: New season of repertoire for 10dd!! (The a capella group I’m in) we’re calling it The Attenborough Season... songs that mention animals in the song titles. My current solos are Dog Days Are Over by Florence & The Machine and Werewolves of London by Warren Zevon (hard one!!)
Songbird_nz: Finally had some free time to upload the pics from my trip to Melbourne for my birthday a few months back! There were also a few vids I took from some of the performance artists at the Queen Victoria Night Market and our night in an Irish pub for sea shanty night... yes that is a thing! So peruse and see if you recognise anything lols
Songbird_nz: Can’t explain why I like this song! Please send help!
Songbird_nz: I haven’t been on in a million years... I gots no computer access on the reg now... so using my crappy cracked to shit iPhone lols. Anywho... birthday went really well until I basically had to cut ties with my Dad and Step Mum... I am officially done with them... and although there are some people that would disagree with this course of action, I can NOT handle the toxicity of my Step Mothers behaviour and how my Father refuses to do anything every time the woman wrongs me. So that also means no more Monday job. I’m financially worse off but my mental health has never been better. So what’s everyone else been up too?
Songbird_nz in reply to BugHug: Thank you for understanding! It’s actually so refreshing to not have to defend my actions here. Life for my general mental wellbeing has been SOOOOOO much better in the last two months. My night terror count is at zero, which is phenomenal! I’ve never had that happen! I don’t have to dilute myself AND I don’t have to pray to every single deity that she’s not going to be a bitch and hoping that for once my Dad will stick up for me. Relieved, happier and I’m my own person capable of making her own decisions. 😊😊😊😊
Songbird_nz: Birthday is not next Sunday but the Sunday after... as a gift I am being treated a trip to Melbourne to visit my sister! (yay! ) which will be happening the Monday after my birthday...
But what should I do on the actual day? My Dad wants to know so he can make plans lol! But I'm completely stumped! All I actually want to do is spend the day with my Boyfriend and our friend Debs. Is that a good enough thing to do?
Peeps who know how to do Birthday things please advise!!
Songbird_nz: I can't win with this ridiculous woman...
Purposefully waited until she had no clients to see so I could go on lunch. I was super hungry.... Breakfast had been at 6am and I went on lunch at 12.30pm. She then completely berated me for going on lunch "too early". I tried to explain to her that she had a gap now, the phones and emails had been very quiet and the fact that I was stupendously hungry meant I'd strike while the proverbial was hot. The next available moment for me to have lunch in between her clients wouldn't have been until 2.30pm and I wasn't going to wait that long considering how hungry I was.
Can someone PLEASE make her see sense? Coz I am having no luck at all!
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Songbird_nz: Ok... so you want me to work around you aye?
You wouldn't have a bar of it last time I asked a favour from you...
I'm fed up of being spoken to the way I've been spoken to these last several weeks. Boss or no boss, step Mother or no step Mother, you have NO right to speak to other people like that. Next time she does it, I'm firmly telling her that I will be leaving out the front door and I'll never be coming back.
Songbird_nz: Absolutely bloody LIVID with today's events.
Get to work, and then get the announcement that Step-Monster/Boss has a virus and has "never been sicker in her entire life"
I get very concerned and tell her to just go to bed. She says "no, I've got a few things that I need to do" All the while standing less than a metre away from me.
She then had the audacity to SIT IN MY OFFICE CHAIR AND COUGH OUT BOTH HER LUNGS OVER MY KEYBOARD AND MOUSE.
Normally, I'd be ok with co-workers or bosses showing up to work under the weather, but if it was the case, every single time that's happened I've been made aware of this situation well before coming in for the day. Not only was I not informed of her illness but the fact that it's A BLOODY VIRUS! Has me so angry, I hope she's aware that if this virus is still active, then she's exposed me (and everyone else I come in contact with) to it.
Also, another contributing factor to my anger is my staffing issues at my other job. In the course of one week we've had one resignation, one termination and my assistant manager on a rather sudden bereavement leave. Also, ALL of our casual staff and other part timers are now back at university, so that leaves only one OTHER staff member to cover some shifts mid week and that is (yep, you guessed it) me.
I absolutely CAN NOT afford to take any time off work if I were to get sick. So, now she's running the risk of getting me sick, but also getting me sick and having to go to work REGARDLESS of conditions coz of our unfortunate staffing issues. She really is not seeing the fact that there are actually HUGE ramifications to her actions today.
I'm sorry for the novel, here endeth the rant
Songbird_nz: Alrighty folks, time for another life update, this one's a bit tricky to write and it may alarm some of you, but please everything has been sussed out so please don't worry or panic too much.
So 2 weeks ago on Saturday in the midst of my mini staycation while my Mum was visiting I had some sort of weird episode.
I had what initially presented itself as a seizure, I was found by my boyfriend on the floor of his room unconscious, convulsing and unresponsive. We were actually due to have lunch with my family that day, and while this was happening I hadn't been in contact with my Mother, but quite luckily she called my mobile and Kirill answered and informed her of the situation to which the response was "CALL AN AMBULANCE!"
So an ambulance was called, apparently all my vitals were completely normal (temperature, blood pressure, blood sugar) except I completely failed the "follow my finger with your eyes" test and I started to be responsive but only one word at a time and once every 2 minutes or so, for about 4 hours the only words I could say were "Help" "Scared" and "Mummy".
The paramedics couldn't for the life of them figure out what was wrong with me, but Kirill did inform them of my night terrors and panic attacks, which some of these symptoms initially seemed like, but to a much more serious extent. They initially put me down as having a panic attack, but because no one was sure, off to the hospital I went.
Spent a whopping six hours in the hospital with my boyfriend, Mum came and joined us a little bit later needless to say it was a much more interesting experience for her than a run of the mill family lunch lol. I must have had my temperature and blood pressure taken about 5 or 6 times since I got to the hospital, every single time the readings came back normal. So the doctor comes to see me and runs some tests, now I'm starting to pass the "follow my finger with your eyes" test and she's shining some lights in my eyes to see if there was anything going on in there, got me to push against her with my hands and feet (I was capable of doing so, but very weak). Although, there was some minutes there where I wasn't able to tell my right hand from my left hand.
Doctor went off and had a chat with her superiors, everyone sort of just went "I dunno!" So they had to send me home as there wasn't much they could do except make sure that I went to my GP so he could refer me to get further testing. So that's what we did!
So been in and out of hospitals and specialist centres for blood tests (all normal) urine tests (also, all normal and not pregnant, but I think the entire planet knows that lol) An ECG (again... normal) and a CT scan (surprise surprise! Normal!) So, we're not 100% sure what happened and why it happened but we are incredibly thankful that it isn't anything nasty or serious, just confused as to what the heck lol. Kirill has been incredible, basically "babysitting" me, as I couldn't really walk normally without losing my balance or getting dizzy or a headache for over a week, so if I had to leave the house he'd be holding my hand. He monitored my sleeping habits and when and where I was taking my pain medication so for that I thank him, in fact BOTH of my parents called him on numerous occasions to thank him for "looking after our baby" which made him feel special
Anywho! I'm so sorry for the novel but I did feel like I needed to explain almost everything haha! I hope I haven't worried anyone significantly as it is all sorted and I have been given the all clear by all doctors and am back to both my jobs without any interruptions! Have a great day guys!
Songbird_nz: Bloody hell...
Just got my ear chewed off for "not listening" to a request from boss from hell aka Step Monster...
In my defence... I was on the phone at the exact same time. So I think it's a little tricky to listen to two people talking to you at the exact same time...
Songbird_nz: Things are getting super real now. Kirill has listed me as his "next of kin" when he signed up for the doctor and the dentist. I'm also his emergency contact as well... does that usually mean good things?
He's also having (finally!) his wisdom tooth extraction today. So I'm having a half day at work, leaving here at lunch time to meet him there, so I can make sure he gets home safely.
He wasn't too chuffed about having to fast for 6 hours before hand though... So I told him that if he didn't he'd poop his pants when he goes under Is this a true thing? I think it's a true thing...