Mika Antic

"Am I everywhere where my traces are
Who knows what I’ve been connecting with
without even touching it
Maybe I’ve resided in my life as well
maybe there are certain signs
or it’s like there’s a stranger.
But still, I can be coped with,
although it’s unusual.
It’s risky to walk with me,
I never get tired.
I must be the only person
who doubts himself
more and more often I have a feeling
that I’m no shape
but that I’m, instead, sailing freely
through my own drunkenness
- left to the sun’s wind
I’m being poured off and poured more.
But still, I can be coped with,
although it’s unusual,
it’s risky to want with me,
I never give up.
Uncorrupted by experience,
a special case of loneliness.
I sometimes invent reality,
so that I’d have somewhere to spend the night.
I’ve seen too much,
to dare to claim,
I’ve found out a lot,
to have a single proof
but still, I can be coped with,
although it’s unusual.
It’s risky to love with me,
I never forget.
I’m trying to understand the teachings
that understand me.
A faith that is willing to believe in me
is unclear to me.
It’s hard to be chained
in my kind of liberty.
It’s easy for me to handle unrest,
I can’t soothe peace.
But still, I can be coped with,
although it’s unusual,
with me, it’s even extraordinary to die…
because I never end."

i must write a title

Last thing he remembers is the unpleasant feeling induced by collision of his nose and the sweaty fallen drop from doctor's forehead.
Afterwards, nothing.
No tunnel with that promising light which infiltrates in someones uterus from the labor room, and leads into some new life.
Just the ceiling.
The ceiling form which he is hanging now, in pose of a bat asleep, together with the rest of alive souls of the dead bodies in this hospital.
They are swearing, screaming, scrambling in their own emptiness in order to reach hospital beds and feel the savour of those who are still hesitating about letting their soul go.
Their madness becomes quieter as the ceiling becomes richer for another soul, so quiet you can hear their joy caused by that same occasion.
Death is patethic.
Hemingway blows his brain out, while some old cluster of decades is held on the life maintaining devices for years, keeping the grave diggers in standby.
But again, there is always some languid body wearing a turtleneck , which has concluded that suicide was a philosophical question.
He always wanted more.
Subsisting in permanent fear of missing something, he was girding himself all the time, to convince himself she is not sleeping.
Now a needle is hanging from his left arm.
I'm jealously watching as some dog owner touches his neck, trying to feel the pulse.
The dog is pissing carelessly.
I'm still jealous, thinking how the ceiling will undoubtedly be insufficiently high for him.
The dog owner saw me and gave me that look from which i could tell he was surprised.
Surprised with my non-helping position by the tree, surprised as he thought i should actually help.
And how could i help him, i mean, i'm just a random rabbit drinking chocolate milk.

grave

today i took my granny to see ophthalmologist.
that guy was probably the hottest man on this ball of stardust we call earth.
and while i was trying to make eyecontact, granny kept complaining about her heart and pain in the back
stupid old bunch of bones
it was an ophthalmologist for christsake

radioux

It's may 26th, 00:30, it's raining and i just saw a snake while getting back home through this park.
How can a person see a snake on a cold rainy night
During winter, snakes are sleeping their winteersleep
They also oversleep half of spring and fall
And than they awake in summer and get all hyperalert
Of course, the've been sleeping for like six months for christs sake
So during summer, they are so full of energy that they cant sleep normaly. I guess they wake up around 6 am (when the sun rises, so if we wanted for some reason convert parts of day into seasons in the year, this would be spring) and are awake til noon when they fall asleep again, but sleep for only like 5 minutes and are awake again around 12:05 (the sun is now at its highest point, so this would be summer). So they are awake from 12:05 til 18:00 or 6pm when they fall asleep again and sleep til 7pm (the sun starts to fade, so i'd say this is autumn). Then they are awake till 11pm when they fall asleep and sleep til midnight or 00:00/24:00 and when they wake up there is only dark around them (WINTER) and than rain starts to fall and i see one of them.
I see them on a spring night on their winter night.
Time collision.