Alan Barbour (CatcherAl) Offline

73 Divorced Male from Bexhill-On-Sea       234
         
Spreading smiles and a little happiness is my forte'. If you need a buddy, well here I am. Have Skype and also can phone anywhere in the world free on my land line.
I write short stories and poetry and will always help out if you need a special poem.Feel free to check out my blogs. I also make necklaces from Semi precious Gemstones and beads. I love my garden and you are welcome to take a walk around my pictures any time and share.
I also love to cook and entertain so any recipes you want to share would be greatly appreciated.

CatcherAl
CatcherAl: The silent dying man.

A priest was preparing a man for his long journey into the night. Whispering firmly, the priest said, "Denounce the devil. Let him know how little you think of his evil."

The priest repeated his words. Still the dying man said nothing. The priest asked, "Why do you refuse to denounce the devil and his evil?"

The dying man said, "Until I know where I'm heading, I don't think I ought to aggravate anybody."
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zz3n
zz3n:
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sky_deep 2 days ago Report
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sky_deep
sky_deep: Al something like this
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CatcherAl
CatcherAl: Ok I will try my best.
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EYEOFTHEDESERT
EYEOFTHEDESERT: Wow amazing
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SunshineDeb
SunshineDeb: Oh I love this!
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sky_deep
sky_deep: What do you think of this idea?
via --> "This is the second year of having a Petunia tree. It holds 16 ten inch pots. This year my husband rigged up a watering system on a timer for it. Soon it will all fill in and you won't even see the pots. It ends up looking like a tree you have never seen!"
9 days ago Report Link
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sky_deep
sky_deep: Yes I love this
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EYEOFTHEDESERT
EYEOFTHEDESERT: Lovely
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SunshineDeb
SunshineDeb: Wow!
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CatcherAl
CatcherAl: Following Sky's post to me concerning a lovely flower Prairie Smoke (Geum Triflorum) I thought I would try to grow some from seed. I duly went onto ebay and found a few sellers in the USA that export to the UK. Not to expensive until one looks at the postage costs. Remember these are seeds and weigh next to nothing. Just out of interest I found a similar seed supplier but this time a more common Prairie Aster.
What a con huh?
https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/324501164885?_trkparms=ispr%3D1&hash=item4b8dc6d355:g:KjIAAOSwjDBgOt4Z&amdata=enc%3AAQAFAAACgBaobrjLl8XobRIiIML1V4Imu%252Fn%25

https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/164477351279?hash=item264b9d356f:g:OmsAAOSwjV9fmzSN

The latter is for 200 seeds priced at $4.56 plus postage of $1.19 , the sort of price that is fair I think?

|Then the seeds I wanted $11.39 for 25 seeds plus $19.50 postage.

All I can think is that the seeds must be 40" x29" and weigh 17oz. each, Just a joke I think? I wish it was folks but no........... that's the price one has to pay.
All I can say is that they won't be featuring in my garden display next year

A huge thanks to Sky for showing me this most unusual flower xxx
6 days ago Report Link
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CatcherAl
CatcherAl in reply to sky_deep: You and that danged wishing well. I suppose it's time I did build one. Question is brick or timber?
6 days ago Report
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sky_deep
sky_deep in reply to CatcherAl: I know I'm a pest, right? I have been asking you for years to build one. Timber..I sent you a pic
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tattyteresa01
tattyteresa01: Al ,the cost of postage doubles the cost of the gift everywhere
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sky_deep
sky_deep: Hey Al...did you ever see these flowers before? Prairie Smoke ( Geum Triflorum ) Looks like cotton candy
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EYEOFTHEDESERT
EYEOFTHEDESERT: Amazing
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CatcherAl
CatcherAl: Wow I must try to get some. Thanks darlin' xxx
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Srchng4Truth
Srchng4Truth: What a unique looking flower!!
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CatcherAl
CatcherAl added new images to his gallery Some pictures from my jungle
15 New Pictures added to Some pictures from my jungle
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SunshineDeb
SunshineDeb: Oh, al, these are beautiful!❤❤🌹
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AutumnButterfly
AutumnButterfly: lovely
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sky_deep
sky_deep: Thank-you for another magnificent garden walk..our earth angel.
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CatcherAl
CatcherAl: I went to see my doctor this morning. “Some one decided to graffiti my house last night!” I raged.

“So why are you telling me?” the doctor asked.

“I can't understand the writing,” I replied. “Was it you?”

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WarriorMouse 11 days ago Report
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Dimjim55
Dimjim55: Muppet
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tattyteresa01
tattyteresa01: lololol
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CatcherAl
CatcherAl: Vincent Van Gogh had a really large family. Here's a listing of some of the lesser known relatives:

The really obnoxious brother - Please Gogh
The brother who ate prunes - Gotta Gogh
His dizzy aunt - Verti Gogh
An aunt who taught positive thinking - Wayto Gogh
And his magician uncle - Wherediddy Gogh
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EYEOFTHEDESERT
EYEOFTHEDESERT in reply to CatcherAl: Lmao
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wave555
wave555: So cool!!!!!!!
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SunshineDeb 11 days ago Report
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CatcherAl
CatcherAl added new images to his gallery A few close ups in the front yard. 1 month ago Report
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AutumnButterfly
AutumnButterfly: pretty
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SunshineDeb
SunshineDeb: So beautiful Al!
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EYEOFTHEDESERT
EYEOFTHEDESERT: Amazing
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CatcherAl
CatcherAl: Funny how strange ideas float through one's head at 2 am in the morning huh?
I was just contemplating about how some of us mere mortals think about love and where it is stored in the body, most would agree it's in the heart? Hence broken hearted, heart throb, hearts filled with love etc etc etc.
To me there is no doubt that love YouTube He sings it far better than I
I also believe that love lightens the body and soul, yet if it does this just how much lighter does it make us?
Can one measure the amount of love a heart holds in ounces or pounds or in the case of being lighter how much lighter does one get?
A helium tank filled with gas can inflate hundreds of balloons of which each can carry a certain weight. Why does the cylinder not float away? Does it get heavier as each balloon is inflated and a certain amount is used?
Therefore it seems logical that with every love that is lost, or, like a balloon, drifts upward into nothingness and is lost forever makes the heart grow heavier?
As most of you know, I have suffered now 10 heart attacks and not including the latest very small one, had only 26% of my heart still working. Does that mean I am unable to store 76% of love that I would have otherwise held in my heart?
The older I get, the more love I hold dear to me increases with each passing year. The true and thoughtful friends I have met here, are so very very special to me.
I have shared your most intimate secrets and held your hand when catastrophe has invaded your life, be it illness or loss I hope I have made a difference with my concern and help, just as you have been there for me.
I have opened my life and dreams to you in my posts of flowers, silly jokes, illness, and unusual thoughts like this post, where I allow you all to be deep in my mind of confusion and lightening flashes of ideas?
My capacity for real and constant love seems to have expanded rather than diminished.
So the puzzle continues. What are your thoughts on this? I would love to know.
My love to you all.................Alan.
25 days ago Report Link
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EYEOFTHEDESERT
EYEOFTHEDESERT: I really enjoy your pictures, jokes and stories that you share with us
19 days ago Report
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CatcherAl
CatcherAl in reply to WarriorMouse: Mousiekins, you don't need any lessons from me poppet. From the first time you were introduced into my life you shone like a star in the night sky, always polite yet with a lovely sense of fun and humour. You are like a puppy, all squirmy and totally adorable, Can't wait for Covid to be over so then I can give you a proper hug. What is a proper hug you may ask? It's a hug where your feet leave the ground and I whirl you in a circle until you're dizzy and filled with Champagne bubbles. xoxox
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WarriorMouse
WarriorMouse: Oh Al. That's so wonderful ❤ xoxo
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CatcherAl
CatcherAl: Just Rewards,

A lady dropped her handbag in the bustle of holiday shopping. An honest, little boy noticed her drop the handbag, so he picked it up and returned it to her. The lady looked into her handbag and commented, "Hmm... That's funny. When I lost my bag there was a $20 bill in it. Now there are twenty $1 bills."

The boy quickly replied, "That's right, lady. The last time I found a purse, the owner didn't have any change for a reward."
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Srchng4Truth 19 days ago Report
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EYEOFTHEDESERT
EYEOFTHEDESERT: Wow omg
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CatcherAl
CatcherAl: My "New" descriptions for dictionary.

ADULT: A person who has stopped growing at both ends and is now growing in the middle.

BEAUTY PARLOR: A place where women curl up and dye.

CHICKENS: The only animals you eat before they are born and after they are dead.

COMMITTEE: A body that keeps minutes and wastes hours.

DUST: Mud with the juice squeezed out.

EGOTIST: Someone who is usually me-deep in conversation.

HANDKERCHIEF: Cold Storage.

INFLATION: Cutting money in half without damaging the paper.

MOSQUITO: An insect that makes you like flies better.

RAISIN: A grape with a sunburn.

SECRET: Something you tell to one person at a time.

SKELETON: A bunch of bones with the person scraped off.

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EYEOFTHEDESERT
EYEOFTHEDESERT: Lmao cutting money in half
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Dimjim55
Dimjim55: I'm fine just wasn't reading it properly
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sky_deep
sky_deep in reply to Dimjim55: Yes you are fine
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Srchng4Truth got the Bro badge from CatcherAl 25 days ago Report
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Srchng4Truth
Srchng4Truth: Thank you so much my loving friend
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zz3n
zz3n: Nicely done!
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CatcherAl got the Big Heart badge from Srchng4Truth 1 month ago Report
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EYEOFTHEDESERT
EYEOFTHEDESERT: Awww! What a sweetheart
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zz3n
zz3n: Most deserved.
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sky_deep 25 days ago Report
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CatcherAl
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jasminepinksky
jasminepinksky: Beautiful garden of the amazing Al
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EYEOFTHEDESERT
EYEOFTHEDESERT: Beautiful pictures
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sarah_spirit
sarah_spirit: Great pics what a fabulous garden thanks for sharing xx
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CatcherAl
CatcherAl: I was just looking at the display picture my friend 'zz3n' has and it gave me the thought of how noble and serene his features are, just like a Native American Chief. Then I thought that my idea was flawed as he sports a moustache and beard and I can't think of any Native American with facial hair, or am I wrong? Please let me know. It's gonna bug me all day otherwise lol
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CatcherAl
CatcherAl in reply to sky_deep: Yes I agree sky xox
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CatcherAl
CatcherAl in reply to justme0123: Yes I found this picture and quite a few more, I stand corrected
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justme0123
justme0123: well you weren't entirely wrong, it isn't common place for facial hair- and over the years their genetics and what not have made it more difficult for them to grow facial hair.
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CatcherAl
CatcherAl: Two young boys walked into a pharmacy one day, picked out a box of tampons, and proceeded to the checkout counter. The man at the counter asked the older boy, "Son, how old are you?"

"Eight," the boy replied.

The man continued, "Do you know what these are used for?"

The boy replied, "Not exactly, but they aren't for me. They're for him. He's my brother. He's four. We saw on TV that if you use these, you would be able to swim, play tennis and ride a bike. Right now, he can't do none of those."
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MontanaMatt 1 month ago Report
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Truthy_01
Truthy_01: Lmao
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CatcherAl
CatcherAl: Falling Fossils.

I found a job cleaning the elegant home of an older couple. Among other duties, I had to dust their many imported carvings and petrified collectibles, as well as pick up after their pets.

One day, I was astonished to find two ivory fossils lying on the floor beside the bookcase. I quickly picked them up, and put them back on the shelf. The next week, the same thing happened.

That afternoon, my employer came into the parlor, her faithful dog behind her. Looking around, she eyed the bookcase. "Nya," she asked the dog, "how in the world do you keep getting your bones up there?"
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sky_deep
sky_deep: Hahahaha
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CatcherAl
CatcherAl: If you ever wondered what the words "True Justice" meant ? Then read on lol.


A motorcycle cop was rushed to the hospital with an inflamed appendix.

The doctors operated and advised him that all was well. However, the patrolman kept feeling something pulling at the hairs on his chest. Worried that it might be a second surgery the doctors hadn't told him about, he finally got enough energy to pull his hospital gown down enough so he could look at what was making him so uncomfortable.

Taped firmly across his hairy chest were three wide strips of adhesive tape, the ultra sticky kind. Written in large black letters was the sentence, "Get well soon! Luv, from the nurse you gave a ticket to last week!"
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zz3n
zz3n: Ouch!
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sky_deep
sky_deep: Hahahaha
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CatcherAl
CatcherAl: This is the way I strive to love.

“I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where. I love you simply, without problems or pride: I love you in this way because I do not know any other way of loving but this, in which there is no I or you, so intimate that your hand upon my chest is my hand, so intimate that when I fall asleep your eyes close.”
― Pablo Neruda,

With my love to all my absolutely fabulous friends here.
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CatcherAl
CatcherAl: The Mommy Test.

This especially to all those wonderful Moms out there. You really are loved and appreciated.

I was out walking with my 4 year old daughter. She picked up something off the ground and started to put it in her mouth. I took the item away from her and I asked her not to do that.

"Why?" my daughter asked.

"Because it's been on the ground, you don't know where it's been. It's dirty and probably has germs," I replied.

At this point, my daughter looked at me with total admiration and asked, "Mommy, how do you know all this stuff, you are so smart."

I was thinking quickly. "All moms know this stuff. It's on the Mommy Test. You have to know it, or they don't let you be a Mommy."

We walked along in silence for 2 or 3 minutes, but she was evidently pondering this new information.

"OH...I get it!" she beamed. "So if you don't pass the test, then you have to be the daddy?"

"Exactly," I replied back, with a big smile on my face.
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EYEOFTHEDESERT
EYEOFTHEDESERT: How sweet
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mj8248
mj8248: Always enjoy these.
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SunshineDeb
SunshineDeb: Lol al
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CatcherAl
CatcherAl: Bob stood over his tee shot for what seemed an eternity. He waggled, looked up, looked down, waggled again, but didn't start his back swing.

Finally his exasperated partner asked, "what the hell is taking so long?"

"My wife is up there watching me from the clubhouse," Bob explained. "I want to make a perfect shot."

"Good lord!" his companion exclaimed. "You don't have a snowball's chance in hell of hitting her from here."
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sky_deep
sky_deep: lol
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CatcherAl
CatcherAl: A boy read a restaurant sign that advertised fat-free French fries.

“Sounds great,” said the health-conscious boy. He ordered some.

He watched as the cook pulled a basket of fries from the fryer. The potatoes were dripping with oil when the cook put them into the container.

“Wait a minute,” the boy said. “Those don’t look fat-free.”

“Sure they are,” the cook said. “We charge only for the potatoes. The fat is free!”
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BeautifullyBroken74
BeautifullyBroken74: Haha love it!
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mj8248
mj8248: lol
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SunshineDeb
SunshineDeb: Haha
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CatcherAl
CatcherAl: The strong young man at the construction site was bragging that he could out-do anyone in a feat of strength. He made a special case of making fun of one of the older workmen. After several minutes, one older worker had had enough.

"Why don't you put your money where your mouth is," he said. "I will bet a week's wages that I can haul something in a wheelbarrow over to that outbuilding that you won't be able to wheel back."

"You're on, old man," the braggart replied. "Let's see what you got."

The old man reached out and grabbed the wheelbarrow by the handles. Then, nodding to the young man, he said, "All right. Get in."
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zz3n
zz3n:
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mj8248
mj8248: lol
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SunshineDeb
SunshineDeb: Ha!! Smart
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jasminepinksky 
jasminepinksky: Hello Al Just dropping by to check on you... are you feeling better? xoxo
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jasminepinksky
jasminepinksky in reply to CatcherAl: I hope you don’t have to do the op and will recover by medication. Glad you had a great time but please have enough rest despite your love for the garden I’m looking forward to your pictures, as always. Stay safe and well
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EYEOFTHEDESERT
EYEOFTHEDESERT: Hope your doing better and healing from fall on ladder
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EYEOFTHEDESERT
EYEOFTHEDESERT in reply to CatcherAl: Poor baby will be thinking of you.
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