CasparTheGhost Offline

I feel like I just come here to change my username once a year and then never touch the account lol

I mean- I'm not dead to anyone who still remembers me? Man, it's been a while hasn't it? Well, If anyone ever wants to chat or anything I'm still around. I kinda forgot this place was a thing for a while to be honest and now it seems a lot of my old friends are gone but- ayyy I could always make new ones?

My brain: LETS WRITE STUFF
me: Yeah sure what to we write, lets think of ideas!
My brain: This is no ideas ONLY WRITE
Me: Uh, but-
My brain: ONLY WRITE!!!!

And this is why I have not yet started the story I want to work on.

I've had nightmares 3 nights in a row, it's time to stop. I want to sleep.

Since I learn about myself by analyzing my OCs I've learned that

Sparrow was what everyone wanted me to be. The hero, kind, courageous, and brave. Never the villain in the eyes of people that mattered. She was a perfect lie that I believed for a long time and that is why I grew to hate using her.

Caspar was the cold truth, she wasn't at first, but I pushed her, I pushed myself to write not what others wanted to see but instead, what was real. Caspar doesn't always save people, she is not always the hero, she hurts and destroys and she has fallen so far in the recent stories destroying everything she is for what she thinks is right only to lose the battle she spent months preparing for. There are people that see her as a hero, and those that view her as a monster.

That is the kind of story that is worth writing. The kind of character that is relatable. Caspar will never get along with everyone. I'm never going to take an OC and play them the way someone else wants me to. I'm not going to bend my writing to the will of those around me. Never again. It doesn't do the other justice and it certainly doesn't make a good story.

That moment when you're the peacekeeper in your RP family and you have to tell everyone to be civil and then host a group meeting. Sometimes I'm like 'they don't need me' but then stuff like this..

Sometimes I lowkey wonder if people recall me being on this site, like old friends and stuff. People I used to write with. I wonder if people ever stop and wonder what happened cause I Don't talk to half the people I used to know here anymore.

Was SecretSparrow

Ya know that moment when you just kinda realize something that changes a lot of things and you just kinda.. oh shit look at that.

My favorite roleplay group is starting to die and I'm sad. But like at the same time, people need to chill the fuck out and not assume shit. Petty drama and people who can't get off their high horse will be the death of the group. Remember, at the end of the day all this is supposed to be fun.

Said it once, I'll say it again. I don't do smut.

Rule number one, don't get dead. lol thanks.

I want to rebuild/ teach the roleplay community here. I feel like there is potential If people just look around.

When you have to kill the character because not doing it would mean breaking the rules you created for it. I didn't plan it this time though, I just kinda wrote myself into a corner and it happened.