To anyone messaging me for the first time, say more than HI if you expect a reply.
If I get 20 hellos and 1 message that has something to do with one of my interests, guess who I'm chatting with?

I love anything weird or spooky (zombies, ghosts, aliens, etc)
Music (Metal/Hard rock mostly)
Sitcoms (Married with Children, Seinfeld, King of Queens to name a few)
Stand Up Comedy (George Carlin, Dane Cook, Nikki Glaser, Howie Mandel, Brad Williams. I could name 50 I love)
Fun hypothetical questions
History/Time Travel
Crazy inventions and unique skills
News you usually only find on the internet
And yes, FLIRTING, but not every chat

Pet Peeves
Small talk
Compliments, I do appreciate them, but they're a waste of my chat time.
Limit them to one or 2 please.
Taking forever to reply. I give people my full attention. If you're not prepared to do the same, please don't message me.

Remember, there's only so much of me to go around (I'd clone myself If I could), so the funnier you are, the more of my chat time you'll get.