Im cheating and I can't stop! (Page 2)
dark_26: been an s%x-addict. Im pretty sure u´ve been very emotionaly hurt by ur partner/partners?
u need to work things out with your current partner before draggin someone else into ur mess. u also need to deside witch one u want to be with. U cant have them both. If u dont love eather of them, leave them both and concentrate on healing urself-esteem instead.
hfsquarehead: I use to cheat on my kids dad and learned that I had no self esteem and do this was making me feel better (only for a little while) then I'd go out and do it again so I realized that everytime I felt bad about myself I'd go and cheat on him. So I realized this pattern and left the guy. I did some soul searching and found that the reason I had suchlow self esteem was that I was abused when I was a kid by my brother-in-law and never told anyone and put it deep down in my mind but dealing woth that and realizing how strong I really was I met a nice guy and we have been together for 16 years and I have never cheated on him once after I met this nice guy I saw how harmful my first relationship really was
stonefabber: spend a little time alone.youll soon find things you like...that make you happy..your body is yours and yours alone.respect it.
lightguide: Addictions have the same feeling in your mind when the feeling is fullfilled..
Do you have a family history of any addictive tendencies of any type?
Where you sexually abused? Ignoring yourself or putting things so deep inside you are not seeing?
Acting on pure need to feel the "high". Admitting a problem is a huge step....The concepts of AA are utilized in a lot of addictive issues.....
I have a lot of life experience with addicts and addictions of my own family and friends....Some of what it could be is childhood experiences that were not addressed, addictive individuals in the family/co-dependencies....
It is often difficult to restrain the urge to get the attention and to have the desire fullfilled...
Does it mean that you do not love the man you are with?
It means that you are hurting yourself and you need help.....The self-destructive behaviour affects those around you like any other addiction (drug/alcohol/gambling).
Because your lover does not know it is eating you up even more.
You know the right thing to do for yourself
The hardest part is finding someone to get you through
Have you tried to go to support groups such as sexual addiction support groups? They will help you to understand and they will provide you with coping strategies so you can live the healthy life you need.
Some are within a community but if you would like to remain anonymous their are some online if you search.
I think it is easy for people to get upset and add emotion/past experiences into the advice that they are giving....
You know what to do..For now have you tried journaling and self discovery?
XxDaddyDemonTakerxX: when u cheat u turn to be the earth scum ,,,, at least have some dignity and confess to ur spouse and then ask for forgivness for doing such a terrible thing ,, then u leave him cause u arent worthy to be with him ......
u arent the victim here ,,, u are the bitch and u need him to forgive u if u even care
real_enterprise: Why don't you teach him how to do it? Talk to him. If it's someone you want to have a life with then you should learn to communicate.
PureSilver67: cheating is wrong fullstop. if you're not happy with the partner you're with, get out and finish it BEFORE moving on to anyone else.
And if someone has a partner - leave them alone. They're plenty of "single" fish in the sea.
CourtGesture: You need to find a boyfriend that makes you feel wanted. "Sometimes" there is a reason people cheat. Sex is not always physical but also emotional. Perhaps, you are lacking something with your boyfriend, on the emotional side. Maybe, maybe not, but it does happen.
CourtGesture: Don't dump the boyfriend if you want to sleep around. Dump the boyfriend if the relationship isn't working and sleeping around is the "symptom of the disease" (term used expressively). Example: Are you sleeping with other guys because your boyfriend is a neglectful jerk that treats you like crap??? Try to understand the reasons why you are sleeping around. Not everyone cheats simply because they are "nympho".
Queenslander41M: As guy who has been cheated on,its the worst feelings in the world...Like they have thrown you love back at you....Broken heart is just one of the side effects of a cheater...No trust is another and trust is everything in a relationship.
Queenslander41M: How about keeping your legs closed and opening your mouth and communicating with your partner.
If he is worth it then talk dont shag!
kat82: If you want to sleep around, then it's better to stay single. It's very egoistic to fool that boy of yours... I believe you have an issue with your self esteem or you 're a sex maniac, our partner can also make us feel beautiful and wanted. Either you haven't asked him to do it or he does it and you just don't care.
kat82: No, I think it's about the character. Being a strong character, you can resist, if you 're truly in love, and not in a relationship because of self esteem issues.
hockeyplayer74: Semi I true morc but its called self control if the person that you are cheating on at that moment doesn't pop in your head before you stick it in some girl and make you stop then I guess they aren't worth it its pretty hard to avoid the situations they are everywhere but you can walk away from them so easy if you aren't weak minded