Elicitation

DarkDreems: Yesterday a fun impromptu bit of play sprang up in the Dark Ds room that had U/us asking progressively deeper questions of each other. I found Myself later thinking harder about one of the answers that I gave. I was asked to describe in one sentence what I think it is to be Dom. I'm expanding on those thoughts today.

To be a Dominant is to push and improve yourself to embody compassion without judgement, to learn how to look inside your submissive, and to oh-so-very-delicately tease through the layers of darkness and pain and yearning. You take their hand, and lead them along the hard path they know they must walk to let that inner turmoil be expressed and released. To outside eyes a Dominant uses a submissive, but that is only the surface layer on reality. Actually We are the ones used, and We would have it be no other way. That is Our sacrifice made in response to their gift. If what We offer matches what they need, then those qualities we build inside Ourselves become part of what elicits their submission. We can't demand that submission, merely strive to meet it half way. In that sense, a Dominant has a submissive dynamic inside themselves to contend with. We feel the pull to give in and become what they need, just as much as they yearn to be reshaped by Us into what We want. For all that We hold the reigns of control, We are somewhat the servant to the slave.

This is not a game. Inflated egos should be checked at the door. D/s can, and should, be fun, but W/we must remain mindful that W/we frequently run with scissors. This applies both to each of U/us as individuals, and as members within a community. A certain level of darkness and dramatic gesture is endemic, but collectively W/we share responsibility for the process being mutually constructive and rewarding.

Cheecho: Well said..My compliments to You.

Rc35: Very well expressed, I'm impressed with the time put into this piece

KittenBlu: very impressive

thatFUNgrl: And E/everyone wonders why You make me smile

Mountain Joe: Looking back .....oh well.

Mountain Momma: This should be a must read before entering any D/s chat room.

aphrodites_saphy: This is exactly what i would percieve and expect of someone who was truly dominant, and as one who possesses a submissive nature it is a need and something that deserves full gratification. Very well spoken indeed. These words made my heart flutter.